God, how I hate having to agree with such an obnoxious troll as Greg Guttman, but when you’re right, you’re right, and with respect to his take on cable news’ running gag on teabagging, he’s right.

(Sorry about the troll comment, Greg. I don’t even know you, so it’s kind of stupid of me to call you a troll, but if I don’t do it I’m afraid no one will pay attention to me. I’ll still follow you on Twitter. Okay, I’m going back into the third person. ttyl)

Guttman, whose late-night Fox News show “Red Eye” distinguishes itself in its relentless pursuit of the crass remark, preferably at someone’s expense, has a point nonetheless in his diatribe taking Anderson Cooper and David Shuster to task for repeatedly (no, I didn’t keep track) making reference to teabagging on the air.

“And so you have Cooper’s joke – it’s just a shame he ripped off the shtick from David Shuster, who apparently has never met a joke he hasn’t beat to death like a hunter on a harp seal,” Guttman noted. “On MSNBC, Shuster repeats testicle-based puns with a fervent relish not unlike an 8-year-old boy who just can’t stop sniffing his fingers.”

Nice image, thanks. In fact, I still smell my fingers, but that’s the level of this conversation, and even Guttman is put off by the nature of it.

“And, this, coming from me,” he added. “I mean, I always thought I was the king of obvious jokes, but I relinquish that crown – because the real obvious joke is Shuster.”

You can probably catch these vids anywhere to see what he’s talking about, but why bother? It isn’t worth your time. But the whole thing is indicative of a sly little trend in which the entirety of cable news land is participating, with supposedly subtle references to sexual behavior complete with bucketloads of assumptions built in. There can be a certain sophistication to some of the banter, a knowingness that can be all-too-authentic, if one is able to discern the authenticity. The problem is that most, if not all, of the noise is self-conscious even as it’s wrapped in the most insidious sort of denial.

That’s the rub. I wouldn’t mind at all if during those off-prime minutes that need to be “filled,” Cooper wants to play-act at flirting with cute female co-anchors or even chortle about teabagging, but I do mind that he is not also able to once, even just for a second, acknowledge he is gay. Unless he isn’t gay, in which case forget what I said. Don’t get me wrong. I think Cooper actually is a good reporter and a serious journalist, unlike so many of his colleagues, and that he truly does strive to, and usually succeeds in, just telling the story, which is what I want.

But when it comes to sex, I think my expectations shift, because I believe we as a society are reaping the ill rewards of our stubborn insistence to remain titilated high school students when it comes to sex. I don’t think we’re better off as individuals, either. Out in real life, where everyone including Cooper lives, things are getting better, loosening up.

But in the fake world, where Cooper works, we’re still stuck in TV Land, where teabagging still gets a teenage titter.